came back from a really important appointment...had to fill out a lot of forms...cause theres risks for getting done what i'm getting done....the lady was able to tell me this but was very uncertain all she could say was it doesn't seem like its a cancer...but we are unable to tell what it is without doing these procedures..so i simply signed the documents my parents were let back into the room...they were told what was important but not to the extent i was though....probably not to worry them..my mom didnt want to sign any forms and was against it...but my dad however signed it along with me..and my mom was sure to tell him that if anything went wrong she'd hurt him first..got home talked to some friends...people who i consider close although there extent of understanding differs from mine....i hate it when people act like there lives are so bad...take my friends for instant..they act as if there parents are the root of their troubles...i refuse to share my thoughts to anyone except a rare few...let people make of what they want to believe...the truth..well who's really ever ready to hear the truth about anothers life...all they must know is that jocelyn will always be there... i used to ask myself is there anyone there for me...i've answered my own question...and the answer is yes ..there is and thats me i have to be there for myself...because not everyone is capable of giving gifts...